Faith over Fear.
It’s been almost five years since my family moved back to South Carolina. In doing so, we took a giant leap of faith to get back to the east coast, closer to family, while leaving behind a life we loved in Texas. In this time I am so proud of how we have grown as a unit (both literally and figuratively) and as individuals. Thanks to social media, many have seen a glimpse of what my life is like, but what most have not witnessed are the experiences that have, at times, truly shaken me to my core… the same ones that have also been the catalyst to lead me back to a place I’d long forgotten - my faith. I’ve always believed in God and been a follower of Jesus, but I’ve found myself both grounded and humbled through a reignited relationship with both. As a Christian, a mother, wife, friend, and colleague, I am consistently reminded how our faith (no matter who or what you believe in) can shape our approach to just about everything in life.
Years ago, when I reached out to a friend and mentor, grasping for any advice that might help me through a complicated situation at work, I was looking for approval to seek retribution. I was desperate for a solution to make life better for myself and for those around me. But thanks to some divinely timed guidance, I instead reflected, and chose to focus on prayer. I prayed. A lot. I gave praise to God for the opportunity to have a job I had once dreamed about. I prayed for the people who were causing harm and for all those who were being treated unjustly. I often still do. I had to learn the hard way that softness and gentleness can often be perceived as weakness. But as I’ve declared before, most simply do not realize the absolute strength of a mother. We are a force to be reckoned with because our strength comes from our gentleness, not in spite of it. Our ability to respond with comfort and understanding when all we want to do is react with anger is a superpower in and of itself.
I recently surpassed the one year anniversary of leaving that “dream job”, and am approaching the one year anniversary of a miscarriage that rocked my world. So much life has occurred in this past year - with trials every step of the way that at times felt like ultimate tests to my faith. I have made the choice, however, to look at the “tough stuff” as opportunities to continue to evolve. I have stopped playing the victim. I pray and listen and am more patient than ever. I am capable of proudly and simply walking away when the game being played is not one I choose to engage with anymore. I am actively choosing faith over fear in all aspects of my life - no matter how uncomfortable it may be.
When we are faced with moments, experiences, even people, that may negatively impact our world, we always have an opportunity. God does not give us more than we can handle, and while I have experienced and witnessed my fair share of heartbreak and heartache - instances where I literally have no idea how the individuals involved keep going - they do. Faith over fear. It’s easy to get lost in the fear, in the doubt, in the misunderstanding of God’s plan and how or why this goliath would be put in front of us - sometimes over and over and over. But God will never give you a goliath, without full faith that He will aid in the awakening of the David inside of you. You have to hold onto your hope, your strength, and your faith. One day you’ll wake up, and it will be months or years after what you thought was a battle you’d never get through. Yet here you are, on the other side of it; ready to take on the next challenge with even more strength, and an unwavering faith.