What moms really need postpartum…
…that you won’t find on a registry.
As we prepare to welcome baby #3 into our home, I have spent a lot of time thinking about what moms truly want postpartum. My entire mindset surrounding what a mom needs during this time has shifted more and more with each sweet soul I have welcomed into the world. As much as I love cute onesies and picture perfect nursery décor, there is so much more that moms truly need to flourish as we begin an entirely new chapter. So whether you are expecting your first or third baby, have a friend or family member who is expecting, are thinking about one day starting a family, or are still praying for your sweet miracle to arrive, I hope this post provides insight and ideas that support you.
NOURISHMENT
Consider bringing meals over that can be frozen or re-heated simply, but are also truly nourishing for the healing mama. More than ever, mothers need high quality nutrition during the postpartum period... wonky hormones, blood sugar levels, weird cravings, and poor nutrition can all play a significant part in the recovery, mood, and mental health of a new mom. Fruit and vegetables are key of course, but also think about high quality protein, healthy fats, and anti-inflammatory foods.
Some of my favorite meals to take families after welcoming a new baby include: vegan enchiladas, immunity soups, red beans & rice packed with veggies (I add in Aidells andouille chicken sausage and tomato sauce), and sweet potato quinoa chili. One tip is to provide the meal in something they can either keep or throw away so mom isn’t stressing over returning your pan/containers. If cooking isn’t your thing, consider dropping off takeout. One of the best gifts we ever received after having Colton was when a friend gifted us a pre-made meal from a local butcher shop, and thought to include an extra one to stick in the freezer for a later date.
Daily Harvest smoothies, soups, and bowls, or Spoonful of Comfort care packages are nourishing delivery services to gift if you don’t live close by, or you can gift easy snacks to supplement nutrition support between meals. Items packed with clean ingredients such as: protein power bites, Needed collagen protein powder, PinkStork postpartum recovery tea, Paleo Valley bars and beef sticks, or even a simple homemade trail mix with organic dark chocolate chips and raw cashews will go a long way to keep mom energized and supported nutritionally.
OPTIONS
Please do not ask a new mom “how can I help?” or “can I drop off a meal sometime?” .. either give her options (for example: would Tuesday or Thursday be a better night for me to drop off a meal/gift?) or say “I’ll be dropping dinner off on your porch on Wednesday”. And then drop the items and run. Do not stay. Don’t ring the doorbell. Send a text once you’ve dashed. Let the family adjust unless they specifically ask you to please come in. When they are ready, I promise, they will ask you to come over.
KNOWLEDGE & GUIDANCE
Our “villages” are often small or nonexistent these days. Even if we are blessed with family close by, there is often an immensely unbalanced focus on what baby needs vs what mom needs. To help the new moms in your life (and their baby) get the best start, consider gifting funds towards programs and people that have designed processes to fully support the needs of a new mother - mind, body, and soul.
A few programs and services I have personal experiences with include: Steph Greunke’s Postpartum Reset Program (an intimate private community and online roadmap for any mama who feels stuck, alone, and depleted and wants to learn how to thrive in motherhood), The Goodnight House Pediatric Sleep Consulting (this mother-daughter duo make an incredible team with over 20+ years experience and expertise between them), and Larimar Lactation (Teresa offers virtual services for anyone not local to San Diego).
If you are local to Columbia, SC I cannot recommend Bundle&Bliss for postpartum doula support. Lucy provides intentional support for new moms and families, and has truly made the biggest difference in my postpartum experience.
Also consider looking up physical therapy/chiropractic or postnatal massage options in her area, because, let’s be honest, the 6 week “check up” is often to simply check a box, and barely scratches the surface of actual recovery needs for a woman who has just birthed a baby.
COMFORT
Comfy clothes that support a postpartum body can do wonders for helping moms feel put together while navigating recovery, minimal sleep, and a new tiny human to take care of. Never underestimate the power of a comfortable yet effective nursing/pumping bra, or a quality pair of joggers and postpartum leggings. Some of my favorites include Calvin Klein nursing bras, Kindred Bravely Everyday Lounge Joggers, Blanqi high-wasted postpartum leggings, or an Eberjey sleep shirt.
I personally also LOVE the idea of gifting a new mom her very own “diaper cake” packed with organic overnight pads, a fridamom peri bottle, perineal ice packs, key essential oils for postpartum recovery and mood/emotional support (white angelica and gentle baby are two perfect options), non-aerosol dry shampoo, and Young Living Claraderm spray for healing.
CLEANING SERVICES
Whether it’s you personally coming over to tackle laundry and dishes or weekly vacuuming, or you go all out and hire a cleaning service, be sure to reach out to mom’s husband/partner/support person to schedule it. I think this is one of the best gifts you could provide to a new moms, especially once dad goes back to work, but don’t make her choose a day or make the decision because she’s almost always going to decline or say she’s managing just fine… but trust me, more often than not Dad will not turn away an opportunity for someone else to clean or fold clothes.
HYDRATION
Hydration is KEY during pregnancy AND postpartum, whether mom is breastfeeding or not. Giant water bottles have been my best friend throughout those early postpartum days and weeks. Add in a bottle of electrolyte solution (my fav is Lyte Balance) for a full hydration experience to keep mom as healthy as possible! Water bottles I love to gift are the Stanley 40oz Tumbler and the BKR 1L Bottle. Also: while caffeine is not the best in terms of nutritional support, I personally don’t know many moms who survive postpartum without it. If the mom on your shopping list is a coffee (or tea) drinker, consider gifting the Ember Mug. Because what new mom (or mom in general) is able to actually drink her coffee while it is still warm? Add in a Superfood Creamer from Laird to ensure she’s getting added nutrition with each sip!
FAMILY SUPPORT
If mama has other kids, consider scheduling a play date where you pick the older sibling(s) up and take them to the playground or park. If a younger toddler is in the mix, gifting a little basket of books or basic toys that mom can have by her nursing/feeding station to keep big brother or sister occupied while she feeds the baby is incredibly helpful. The older kids will welcome the attention being spent on them, and will love that they received something “new” (plus they genuinely do enjoy being involved in the feeding process).
GIFT CARDS
Tried and true, gift cards make amazing gifts. Think outside the Target or Amazon box, and consider gift cards to honest or hello bello for diapers and other natural, supportive items moms need such as hand soaps, lip balms, and detergent. Local organic food shops or coffee shops (ideally ones that deliver or offer curbside pickup) are also a thoughtful option with the added bonus of supporting local businesses. A gift card to Audible is another home run choice so mama can listen to books during middle of night feedings or when she’s home all day with an infant. (And as mentioned previously, gift cards for massages + an invitation to babysit once mom is comfortable leaving baby, is an incredible offering).
PAMPERING
There’s something about becoming a mom where you almost automatically, instinctively, begin to put yourself last - especially when it comes to self-care. Creating a gift basket for whenever mom might get a moment to herself would be such a beautiful, welcomed gesture. This could include a spa headband or silk scrunchies, a skincare mask or gift set, an assortment of lip balms or bath oils, and comfy sippers.
Whether you stick to their registry, select something from this list, or simply offer your congratulations via text or social media, please know that any level of support provided to a new mom (whether it is her first or fifth baby) goes such a long way. Words of encouragement are what we need more than anything as we welcome new life, and an entirely new iteration of ourselves, into the world.
And if you are an expecting mama who is reading this while working on your own registry, I encourage you to add some of these items to your list. Let’s be the generation that normalizes postpartum recovery, care, and support as a necessity for new moms as much as we emphasize that perfect swaddle and stroller.
[Disclaimer: I am in no way a health professional. Nothing included here is to be considered medical advice, but simply a synopsis of my personal experiences with postpartum recovery, whether that be my own or those of friends and family.]